Life gives you lemons

When you try to move on with your life, life likes to remind you of where you've come from... It will bring ppl from your past back into your life. Old Flames even. Here I am picking up the pieces and moving on  and it seems like that is my biggest battle. I'm fighting for all that I have...all that I have earned. Is this a test?

McDummy is back yet again. Well not officially. He's a T.A at my nephew's kidnergarten. I hope he remains professional and my nephew doesn't have to go through anything b/c of our past. Things should be ok...I pray.

I think about who I would have been had I stuck around and dealt with what McDummy had been giving me. I think I would have lost myself in the mix. No self esteem in sight. Just settling for less. Knowing damn well better was out there for me.

My love would have kept me blinded for so long.... I found a song that conveys how I felt back then. Pay attention to the video. Look at the transition. Where was this song when I was going through it IDK?



I'm glad I had the strength to carry my heavy heart and keep walking. Instead of just staying their hurting. I don't regret moving on at all. I knew something good was out there for me. I just had to meet it halfway. So what if I was damaged goods...I would be priceless in someone's eyes. I hurt, but I kept on moving.

Sometimes I wish that McDummy would have let me heal completely. My heart no longer has cracks, but it has scars. He kept digging praying for me to shatter. That's why this song speaks to me. The whole transitions. From normal to feeling pain that hurt like hell. To eventually moving on and being in a good place. Wherever that may be.

I overcame it.

I remember talking to my love about my past relationships. I put up with a lot of sh*t from guys. I was there to build them up and they tore me down. But over the years I just couldn't seem to get it right until now. I was like MJB before she found love y'all!

I found it now. I'm so thankful that I have. This is what I should have been experiencing all along. This right here. So what if we have negative folk who don't believe in us. I will continue to meet him halfway everytime. I hope I transitioned correctly and you guys are not thinking that I am talking about McDummy b/c i am not! I'm talking about My Man.

McDummy was the catalyst that put me on the right path. I still have my moments when I hurt but then I remember what I have and what will be.

It's okay to be in love....It's your time.